When working with Leaders they often tell me that they regularly give positive feedback to their people as they believe that it is important to “catch people doing things right.” When asking them why they think it is important they identify several reasons;
- Giving praise and recognition helps motivate people
- Positive feedback helps an individual recognize and understand what good looks like, which helps increase the likelihood that this behaviour will be repeated
- It increases peoples’ confidence to be given specific examples of where they have done well
- People feel valued if they know that their actions will be noticed and appreciated
And the list goes on…
These are all valid reasons and all ones I agree with as I firmly believe giving praise and recognition is a critical skill in helping develop an engaged and confident team of people. Having a leader outline the positive impact such behaviour has on the individuals they work with makes the next question I ask all the more interesting;
“When was the last time you took time out to reflect on what you do well?”
This question is often greeted with silence while the individual considers their answer. With their people they can quickly rattle off the answer about when they last gave them some praise, but when it comes to themselves the answer proves to be more elusive. Taking time out to reflect on their own performance is something that many people tend to avoid, giving the excuse that they are too busy, that they don’t view it as important and that their time is better spent focusing on what remains to be done.
Bearing in mind how many benefits they believe there are in providing positive feedback to their people I find it baffling that they don’t see that similar benefits can be gained by taking time out on a regular basis to acknowledge what they have personally achieved. Instead they apply self-inflicted pressure by compiling a things-to-do list and focusing on the next task on the list.
Various research studies by people and organisations such as Martin Seligman, Shawn Achor and Wharton University have shown that taking 5 minutes on a daily or weekly basis to write down 3 things that you are grateful for/that have gone well/that you are proud of leads to an increase in happiness, lower levels of stress and greater levels of optimism and energy.*
People I have coached who have practised this technique report that they subsequently feel more confident and better equipped to handle the challenges they face. For example, problem solving has not proved to be as stressful owing to the subsequent rise in their self-belief, they are more willing to trust their instincts and are more prepared to step further into their stretch zone.
If you want to increase your leadership resilience I believe that it is beyond doubt that self-reflection is a crucial element in your development.
Here are three questions for you to consider;
? What else could you spend 5 minutes on that would yield a greater benefit?
? What would stop you allocating 5 minutes a day for self-reflection?
? What are the 3 things you will write down for today?
